I Will Not Die

No doubt we always think of springtime as the time for gardening. The birds chirp and all that stuff, the days slowly get warmer and our sleeves shorter. After being pent up indoors hiding behind frosted windows all winter we like to stretch our legs, venture outdoors and play in the dirt while we tell our children that we’re not really playing in the dirt.

But before we know it, the summer is over, the plants we grew are all dead and it’s time to forget about gardening until next year.

To hell with that.

I really enjoy gardening. The irony is that for the last couple of years, I haven’t had all that much time to garden. My wife has tended to our gardens far more than I have been able to. Momentarily free from the burdens of a job, I was disappointed looking at the garden bed I was turning over because I never really got to play in its dirt.

To hell with that too.

You see, if I wasn’t so determined to become a teacher, my second choice would actually probably be a gardener. I love plants. I can kill them and not feel bad. You just can’t do that with people. As much as I disliked my bosses at my job, I would still feel bad if I killed them.

I swear.

Besides the lack of guilt that might come from poor behavior though, there are lots of other reasons I love gardening. It’s a great way to nurture life. I can plant things and see what happens. I can make things blossom. I can grow nice green things. I can smell nice smells.

I can watch my daughter put handfuls of dirt in her mouth and gulp. Then I can watch her smile and wonder if she really enjoyed the ball of mud she just ate as much as her big grin tells me she did.

I can look carefully around me for any potential onlookers moments before I kneel down in an apparent act of picking weeds so I can steal a bite or two of mud for myself.

Kidding.

I swear.

So when winter is coming, all the joys of gardening fade. Unless you do what me and my wife did when we went looking for bargains. Sure enough, we found houseplants of all things on clearance prices that no doubt left retailers losing money. Gigantic Boston Ferns for $0.50, Ardisia, Pilea, Philodendron and Croton plants for less than a dollar, and Schefflera and Rubber plants for eager chump change.

I’ve now got a small tropical forest in my home and we only spent about ten bucks (which included dirt–for planting, not eating–and even several pots). All I need now is a CD with jungle music that I can play in the background and an industrial humidifier. Something tribal would be great if anyone has any suggestions.

If you enjoy gardening as much as I do, I suggest just moving it indoors. Pretty much every store is clearing space for Christmas merchandise. You’ll probably find some real bargains. Most of the plants we found were originally between $6.95 and $19.95.

Is getting many houseplants a little hippie? You bet. It’s that whole return to nature thing, only I can’t do that so well in the ‘burbs of Indianapolis so I just brought the outdoors in. Forget that constant electronic hum emitted from a television that creeps into the center of your brain. Try calcium oxalate from a Dieffenbachia rubbed casually in your eye. It’s way more fun.

I swear. 

If you enjoyed this, you can join the rss feed and be updated about new material. If you don't know what rss feeds are, this article explains them.

Dereck :: Nov.11.2008 :: Life, Tips :: 16 Comments »

Now that is the best kind of war.

Not only is it the best because it’s the sort that makes the best films and the best novels, but it’s also the best because it’s the most winnable kind of war to wage.

The Best Kind of War

It makes for the best of entertainment because it’s the brutal kind of total war that brings to mind the epic, almost endless feud. We’re talking about Greece versus Troy. We’re talking about the free world against the Nazi clenched fist.

It’s the most winnable kind of war because if knowing your enemy fully is the primary requisite to a successful campaign, then you are guaranteed access to the best spy available. You have an ear to anything and everything that’s said, planned, devised. That information will become the decisive betrayal that turns the course of the war into your direction.

But before we get too far, we have to make sure that he or she who you declare to be your mortal enemy is in fact just you and you alone.

Make Your Enemy the Right One

So who is your enemy? Or, if you’re particularly lucky, who are your enemies?

If you’re a younger version of me, they are your father, your jealous bosses, your angry spouse, your coworker. They are your government, your birthright, your poor luck. Your lack of rich friends, rich family, your lack of opportunity. Fight them if you want. Fight them all bloody hell. At the end of the day, bloody knuckles and all, you will still find more of them.

You won’t win that way.

If you choose to fight external enemies, you will squander your precious few days faced off against a horde whose ranks will gladly replenish themselves right in front of your flailing arms and courageous yells of valor. They will mock you.

You must square off in the mirror.

Total War Against Yourself

The less futile route is to envision some future life whose sandy beaches and blue skies above taunt your mind behind the closed lids of your eyes. Imagine who you want to become. He or she must be your new hero; the uncanny villain could be your present self.

At this stage your enemy is just one.

Now this is familiar turf. But far from being a villain of villains, this antagonistic couple is composed of mere antagonists. Like a carefully guarded agreement the future you can gain the epic upper hand and guide with a kind of grace found mostly in full friendship, the present you off on a journey to meet the future you.

Enemies Fewer Than You Think

If it’s your boss who prevents your ascent, you can fight your boss or you can leave. If it’s your father who strangles your growth, you can battle him or walk away. If your friends are holding you back, you can try to change them or you can go off and look for new ones. In each case, the only versions whose outcomes you can guarantee are the ones where you face off against yourself.

You have within you the possibility to make the greatest gains.

You should just remember that those gains will come from your encounter with yourself. Everything else is just a waste of good war.

Dereck :: Nov.06.2008 :: Growth, Perspectives, Success :: 24 Comments »

Henrik at the Positivity blog gave me an opportunity to speak to his audience. For the occasion, I wrote an inspirational piece called Your Beacon in the Night. I’d like to encourage you to go and check it out. I’m interested to know what you think of it.

If any of you use Stumbleupon or other social bookmarking sites and enjoyed the article, you can help me return Henrik’s generosity by giving it the nod. You can review the article on StumbleUpon by going here.

For any of my readers who are not familiar with the Positivity Blog, I recommend that you take some time to read through some of the articles there. It’s some of the best on the Internet. You can browse articles in his Archives by going here.

Henrik’s success as a blogger is well deserved. You can sign up for his RSS feed by clicking here. It should be a staple of your reading diet. It’s been mine for some time now, and I’m quite healthy as a result.

Finally, if you’ve come here from the Positivity Blog and are looking for the article Love that I mentioned in the article there, you can read it here.

Thank you Henrik for letting me write for you.

Dereck :: Nov.05.2008 :: Blogosphere, Site Related :: 3 Comments »