Good Reads/Dereck
Digg/dacoatne
Facebook/Dereck
YouTube/dacoatne
Del.icio.us/dacoatne
Technorati/dacoatne
MyBlogLog/dacoatne
Twitter/dacoatne
Why smart people are unhappy
Email this article to a friend
After I wrote the wildly popular post Why Smart People Fail, I received several interesting responses, some in the comments section and others privately through the contact form on this website. One example was the comment that presented two very valid questions, one of which was “If you’re so smart, why aren’t you happy?” Later, I asked a coworker of mine to read the article and tell me what she thought about it. Ultimately, she felt it was lacking. It was lacking something to her because she is familiar with the periodic unhappiness that I feel while at my work, in my cubicle, my hell, my dungeon. 
In what I felt was a sarcastic question, she referenced my mention of the phrase “when in Rome, do as the Romans do” and asked, “so how’s that working out for you?” Ouch. My response ultimately was, “actually, I’d say pretty well.” I went on to illustrate the many successes I have had at my work and in my life. I told her how, while in Rome, and while doing as the Romans do, I was building up my resources and kicking some Roman ass. We eventually embarked on an e-mail exchange that maintained the “Roman” theme, an analogy I found so useful then, that I’ll use it here too.The analogy goes something like this: smart people fail because they forget they are in Rome. In order to succeed, they have to come to grips with where they’re at. The “Romans” in this analogy are all the many “common” people that surround the smart people. So are smart people, acting as Romans so they can succeed like Romans, happy? Not always and here’s why:
They are extremely bored
Smart people in a Roman world are more than likely only practicing a fraction of their talents. The things Romans do are really quite simple: work, play, sleep, eat, poop. Wake up and repeat. And for Romans, these are fun! But, as I said in the other article, smart people are puzzle-solvers. They like a challenge. They get bored when they are not challenged, and because the vast majority of careers out there are “production based” (do task a, then task b, etc.), their jobs are quickly mastered by smart people and are only challenging during that learning phase. After they learn the job they’re in, they’re done. Out. Finished. Bored. In the Roman world though, under normal circumstances, once a Roman job is learned, that means it’s time for a promotion. The problem is that the Roman world operates much more slowly than smart peoples’ learning capacity. There is often a very long delay between when a smart person learns the Roman job and when he can advance to the next, more challenging job. During that delay, smart people are left wandering around bored out of their minds.
They feel stuck
A lot of smart people out there in the Roman world are only in the Roman world because they need to eat. In other words, they need the frickin’ money. So, they work away, day in and day out and after a long enough period of time, it occurs to them that they might never get to leave. They make just enough money to survive and the slow pace of promotion gives them the dawning sensation that they might end up doing the same thing they are now every day until they die. With prospects like that, it’s no wonder smart people can be unhappy.
They comprehend the futility of their situations
This one’s my personal favorite. Smart people have greater comprehension skills. They tend to connect the dots both better and more into the future than typical Romans do. For a smart person, doing the same thing each and every day just so they can get a paycheck, just so they can buy some stuff eventually seems almost laughable. Live to work to live. What? That’s it? Scary. But ask a Roman about it and they’ll smile with satisfaction and naively say, “Yep, that’s what we Romans do!” Smart people though, just aren’t wired that way. They’re problem solvers not problem-perpetuaters. They like to fix things not keep them broken.
They are lonely
A lot of smart people look around them and only see Romans. Because they don’t have enough in common with the Romans to really enjoy the gladiator fights and Christian sacrifices going on at the local coliseum, they end up being loners half the time. Their down time is spent either begrudgingly in the presence of tolerable Romans or simply in the absence of anyone at all.
They have no exit strategy
They miss their fatherland. They work in Rome so they can eat but cannot leave. So smart people wander around the streets of Rome pretending to be Roman but because they don’t have many options, they stay in Rome forever, unhappily. They let themselves become Roman. They spend just enough time in their Roman labors that they never figure out an escape route.
The optimistic answer to all of these
Good god man! Get out of Rome! Or at least, as a starting point, figure out once and for all that the reason you’re not very happy, is because you’re simply not a Roman. If doing all the things that makes everyone else around you feel peachy-keen makes you feel sick all the time, it’s probably a good indication that you’re just not genetically a freakin’ Roman. Find some things to do outside of your Roman duties that are challenging and stimulating, recognize that the Roman way is the futile way, plan your escape and find some friends. It’s ok to walk around the Romans and secretly know deep down “I’m just not like you.” You don’t have to be like your coworkers, you just have to act like it for a while. Then once you find what you really love, pack your bags and leave.
If you enjoyed this, you can join the rss feed and be updated about new material. If you don't know what rss feeds are, this article explains them.
165 Responses to “Why smart people are unhappy”
Leave a Reply
Yeah! werk sux because I am too smart!
Lucky for me, I can watch Oprah at work so I can connect with other smartlings…
Thank you for putting into words how I feel all the time.
I’m also lazy, but that pretty much sums it up. I stopped socializing with people a few years ago, I just never had anything to contribute to any of the conversations. I didn’t care about what they were talking about. Now I spend a lot of time wondering why I continue to exist. I don’t believe in god, heaven, or hell, so why not just kill myself?
This is really awesome. Like Ryan said, I have felt like this for a long time.
I have abnormally large ankles.
3. Geoff
You need Rumsfield poetry.
The Unknown
As we know,
There are known knowns.
There are things we know we know.
We also know
There are known unknowns.
That is to say
We know there are some things
We do not know.
But there are also unknown unknowns,
The ones we don’t know
We don’t know.
Discover the unknowns.
5. Mel. So what? Health problems? See a doctor.
Sometimes I go without wearing pants just to shake things up a bit.
Geoff: The reason you want to kill yourself is because you have no purpose in life. That’s a hard one to get out from under.
The thing is, ultimately EVERYTHING is futile, because you’re just going to die in the end anyway, and everything wonderful you and your fellow humans did will now be useless to you.
And so, knowing that the Grand Prize is a load of bullshit, you can either cash out to avoid the pain of disappointment, or opt for the boobie prize: Live new experiences.
The boobie prize is not constructive in the traditional sense, but doing new things helps give you a new perspective. That perspective can lead to a challenge, which can lead to a passion, which is fulfilling for the time that you are passionate about it (remember: nothing is permanent).
Have you ever walked through the farmlands in Laos? They’re really quite beautiful, and the people are friendly, and drink this nasty alcohol that puts hair on your chest so thick you flog yourself to death when the wind blows.
Trust me: though the ultimate purpose doesn’t exist, you can carve out a purpose of your own. You just have to get off your ass and do something un-Roman.
WOW! There are a lot of smart people checking out this blog. Do you folks know that in reality, you’re probably just totally average – just like me? Truly smart people march to the beat of their own drummer. Truly smart people do not sit in cubicles working for other people while thinking about how “smart” they are. Truly smart people do not reply with stupid comments to stupid blogs. Face it. You are average – just like me. Live with it.
Thanks for articulating the realities many of us face.
The social withdrawal aspects are particularly nasty as the isolation it produces is both a salvation and a curse. The very people I would love to hook-up with are probably holed-up somewhere like I am, doing their best to insulate themselves from the vapid and disingenuous social nightmare that surrounds us.
Average Joe: I’d hardly call an IQ of 140 “average”.
Wolter: Ahahaha, an IQ of 140 is more common than you think.
You can’t really claim alienation based on a supposed measure of intelligence until you’re in the ‘genius’ range, which 140 sure ain’t.
Really? I certainly feel alienated.
I certainly can’t live on the same level as the rest of my coworkers. All they’re interested in is sports, who’s fucking who, the price of gas, and some superficial tidbits about the political race (mostly to do with the awful things one side said about the other).
You can’t hold a conversation with those kinds of people about quantum physics, Nietzsche, geopolitics, astronomy, or any other cool stuff.
Mention that Socrates and Plato were not great thinkers, but rather misguided idealists, and you are rewarded with a blank stare.
You cannot bond successfully with others unless you can reach a common ground, and common ground there ain’t.
BTW, common != average
Wage slavery fucking sucks.
I wrote this about it 2 years ago:
http://technutnews.com/2006/08/10/shorter-4-6-hour-workdays-would-benefit-us-all/
As a successful person and member of Mensa with a 173 IQ…I relate completely with this article. I should also add that an IQ score by no means measures how smart a person is, or has any bearing on their current performance level. The old saying “You can lead a horse to water” applies.
BTW…average IQ is 118, not 140…140 is considered gifted and only 6% of all tested ranked this high. Hence 140 is not common, it is exceptional.
> You can’t hold a conversation with those kinds of people about quantum physics, Nietzsche, geopolitics, astronomy, or any other cool stuff.
Mention that Socrates and Plato were not great thinkers, but rather misguided idealists, and you are rewarded with a blank stare.
You cannot bond successfully with others unless you can reach a common ground, and common ground there ain’t.
I’d say your problem isn’t one of intelligence, it’s one of humility.
I understand what Dereck and many of the comm enters are expressing – let me add my name to the list of people who find it difficult to carry on the kind of mindless inane conversations that many people have BUT I completely disagree with the focus of many of these comments and even the post itself.
In my opinion “Successful people do what unsuccessful people don’t do.” Sounds stupid I know but I believe it with all of my heart. You may be born “smart” – you may be born with a high iq or an exceptional emotional intelligence or some incredible gift that makes it easy for you to do something that everyone finds difficult. That in and of itself doesn’t make you a success. Of course we all agree on this.
My concern is (I don’t know any of you people so why am I concerned) that what is being proposed here is a world view that says “I am special (Why? Because I feel special and I am ’smart’) and the rest of the world are a bunch of idiots. I can’t wait to escape these idiots.”
The problem is unless you are all planning on establishing some utopian ’smart people’ colony somewhere you are always going to be surrounded by “those people.” Do you really mean to tell me that with all your intelligence you can’t figure out a way do enjoy yourself with “those people?”
At the end of the day you are not the sum of your words or thoughts – you are the sum of your deeds. If you steal stuff – you are a thief. If you have extra-marital affairs – you are an adulterer. If you succeed – you are sucessful and if you live your life like everyone else – you are average just like them.
Sure, some people have abilities others don’t have but at the end of the day we don’t consider the dead poor, mensa-level iq alcoholic bum on the street a success and the lower-than-average iq schmuck who worked his ass of and amassed a fortune a bum.
I was VERY encouraged by the first couple of posts I read here – I thought “wow, someone who can clearly articulate the struggles that anyone who is determined to be a success has.” and that is exactly what posts like the “Shut up and listen” post focussed on: the fact that YOU are your own worst enemy in your quest to succeed. Unfortunately it seems to be turning down the road that says “you poor smart, talented person – you are so persecuted in this world. those ignorant fools out there. one day you can leave them all behind. in the meantime be miserable and try to make yourself feel better by increasing the amount that you hate and despise those stupid normal people.”
I hope I am wrong – I hope this blog ends up taking the road it started down first.
oh and by the way – smart people are unhappy for the same reason stupid people are unhappy: because they CHOOSE to be.
If you disagree with that statement than you just endorsed a world view where you have no control over your own life or emotions and are at the mercy of whatever powers govern the universe. good luck with that – I’ll be over here working on deter ming my way to happiness
@ veritas – I am still composing a reply to your e-mail. Expect it by the weekend at the latest… Hang in there
The issue is not one of creating some utopian society (as if such a thing were even possible), nor is it a sense of powerlessness.
It is rather an extreme frustration at having to work with apes that *just* *don’t* *get it*, no matter how many times you explain, no matter how much they’re screwing the whole thing up, no matter how much pain they’re causing for everyone down the road.
You can see *quite clearly* that they’re doing it way wrong, and yet nobody understands you when you explain why, even when you demonstrate the better way.
Have a look at the movie “Idiocracy” for a demonstration of this.
If you lived in a colony of retards (say, IQ 60-70), how much would you enjoy going out with them for some fun? Sure, you CAN enjoy yourself, but it does get tedious after awhile, and you will find yourself wishing for someone who can talk about movies TV sitcoms and the hockey pool and gossip that goes beyond “hehe… him dum dum!”
Now slide that scale up a bit, and you have a similar situation (though likely not as extreme), where the things the other people do simply don’t interest you enough to do day-in, day-out. And most of the things that you find interesting and stimulating are beyond them.
Of course, the solution is to find more people like yourself. I seem to recall reading somewhere that the maximum IQ spread before you simply don’t connect is around 20 or so, but I can’t for the life of me find the publication.
Being surrounded at all times by people you can’t connect with is basically a form of isolation. Is it any wonder that it breeds unhappiness?
Wolter: Judging “smarts” by IQ is like judging a book by its cover. An IQ is nothing but a litmus. The last IQ test I took I scored a 138, so WOW, you’re 2 points smarter than me! WHOO HOO for you! But the questions are mundane questions that you’ve been taught to remember. They’re never questions that truly challenge your inner workings. As far as I’m concerned, IQ tests are written by other “smarties” who think they’re smarter than they really are. Drop 10 city-slickers in the middle of the wilderness and see who survives the longest. That’s a much better test than a silly IQ that only determines if you’ve remembered how to calculate the volume of a cone.
Joe, I’m not talking about IQ; I’m talking about intelligence, and used IQ as a marker of intelligence differential because everyone understands it to be an indicator of cognitive ability, whether that assessment be correct or not.
Regardless of IQ’s ability to actually measure intelligence, the central theme to my earlier statement remains, and you are simply muddying the water with irrelevant arguments.
Wolter –
again I struggle between two positions here because on one hand I know exactly what you are describing. I know what it is like to feel frustrated and isolated because the fact that – for whatever reason – you are able to see to the root of a matter naturally leads you to prioritize and value things differently.
At the same time I think much of what is being debated in this thread is not actually debatable because we are mixing a couple of very different goals in our discussion. Part of this discussion is talking about being successful, living and achieving, being challenged by what you do. Another part of this conversation is aimed at being happy and enjoying life.
These are two very, very different things at times. Yes, it is possible to enjoy what you do, challenge yourself, meet your potential AND be happy and enjoy life. Unfortunately most of us have nothing but poor examples on either opposite extreme: on one the individual who throws themself into work and achievement but sacrifices happiness along the way and then, 20 years later looks back and realizes that nothign they accomplished actually meant anything because it was never enough and in the process they missed out on the love of friends and family and other lasting activities.
On the other hand you have the vast majority of the population who sacrifices their talents and abilities and trades them in for the security of a 3% a year cost of living adjustment. Never challenging themselves they try best they can to enjoy their family – they constantly grasp at objects – new cars, boats, tvs – to make themselves feel better and then 20 years later they look back and realize that they wussed out. that they could have accomplished so much more but because of their fear they refused to take the chances necessary.
Every day of my life is a struggle to reject either extreme. I want to have my cake and eat it to – I want to continue to enjoy the love and happiness my family brings me while living a life that reflects an undying determination to find and hopefully surpass my potential.
But that’s just it. The battle is against MYSELF not other people. How many times have I failed and taken the easier path because I was lazy or afraid of failing? How many times have I wasted my talents and abilities? How dare I look at anyone else and think to myself “man i am so much better than that ape of a human being. what a bafoon, man i am glad i am intelligent enough to see that the things that make him happy or stupid, vain, empty, meaningless things.”
We are all nothing more than the sum of our actions. Saying that we are more intelligent that “those apes” or waiving around results from some test means absolutely nothing until it is backed by an action.
The world owes us nothing – we can huddle together and roll our eyes at the idiocy of the masses if we like but it won’t get us one step closer to achieving our own potential.
Dereck –
appreciate it – I don’t ever want anything I am expressing to come across as though I feel you owe me or anyone else any kind of explanation. This is your space to express your thoughts and if those expressions do not match the things that I am striving to do it is my responsibility to move on – not yours to change.
All the same – I appreciate you taking the time to thoughtfully reply.
Interesting subject. No time to think about it enough right now but will come around again and see where it goes. Thanks for sharing Bing.
I can certainly empathise with this article and a lot of the comments. I’ll just contribute my own thoughts, not trying to tell anyone else how they should think.
I was touched by the message about how everything is pointless because nothing is permanent. Intellectually, one can easily work that out. But also intellectually, one can work out that intellect is not the sum total of human existence. We non-Romans are still human beings, just ones who think much faster and with greater intuitive depth.
I guess this is me redefining the word “success” as predicted in the first article about failure. But since we’re here experiencing life, the life we experience is the perspective from which we assess the myriad goals we are told we should want to aspire to by vulgar society. In that respect, of course “we” are going to have different goals and seem to fail when viewed through the popular lens.
I think there is a good case to be made for eradicating this concept of “should”. We impose it upon ourselves and it leads to feelings of guilt and inadequacy since extreme intelligence is often accompanied by extreme self-doubt. I am my own harshest critic by far.
Before this gets too long, however, I’d like to zip to the one thing I really wanted to say.
I do believe in God and the continuation of life after death. Not for any lightweight reasons either. I was an out-and-out skeptic and cynic for many years and this desperate sense of unfairness at a universe that creates me, makes me aware I am going to die and then kills me off with my memory and awareness dissipating into the eternal void really took hold and turned me into a bit of a pain in the proverbial.
Then my father died and I fell unemployed from my stimulating but badly-paid teaching job. I determined to work out the meaning of life by putting all my panicky energy into this quest full-time. I thought that the very least I could do in this life was to give the ultimate question a stab. A really serious and dedicated stab.
I spent 18 months obsessing and using my preternatural concentration to assimilate as much info as I could and let it bubble away in my subconscious which deals with more inspirational thoughts that are not necessarily all mapped out entirely rationally. Creative thinking, as it were. Is creativity a valid template for appraising the experience of life? Yes of course since everything I experience is filtered through my own consciousness and therefore everything exists inside my own head.
And what I found was that the more I read about quantum physics the less solid and externally independent the world around me became. Everything became relative, interdependent and even insubstantial. There was also the crossover from this advanced theorising into less celebrated disciplines like parapsychological studies. But all they turned out to be was people researching effects of the mind. Seemed valid enough to me as long as they had a rigourous methodology. And the good ones do.
This all seemed fascinating and a good use of my “downtime” (though of course I would argue that there is nothing more worthy of spending time on than working out why we exist), and the answers regularly danced tantalisingly close to the tip of my tongue. I began to dream of these questions and continue thinking about them whilst asleep.
Then one day something happened, the right circumstances came together, I heard one thought on the radio about what existence is about and that began an unfolding of the whole thing in my mind. Parapsychologists call is an Out of Body Experience.
And as sure and as rationally as I am sitting here typing, my consciousness did indeed leave my body. And my questioning mind continued to analyse everything during the process. That was what convicned me it was real. I was not being led along a story like a dream and I didn’t fall asleep and then start lucid dreaming. This was: awake-oh look at that swirly pattern in the sky, that can’t be real-oh I understand about that part of existence now-wow I’m rising out my chair and passing through my ceiling…etc.
(Extremely) long story short, I met other awarenesses whilst I was out and talked to them, then felt this “at oneness” with the whole universe. I saw the sheer scale of it all. There is no way to do any of that justice here, poets and artists for all human history have been trying to encapsulate what this inner sense of magnificence is, where it comes from and what it means to us scraping an existence on this planet.
It sounds a bit weird I know, but well I was so sure everything was mundane and solid and rational and boring and pointless, I guess only something like that was ever going to change my mind.
Most of you will no doubt conclude that I refused to accept the reality of the impermanence of life and in my trauma invented a trip in my mind out of some kind of psychosis to reassure me that life and learning go on for all eternity, well beyond one human lifetime. You may indeed be right, that is one plausible explanation.
But all I would say to bring this back to the realm of some sort of verifiability is that if you really delve into QM and the reputable parapsychologists who perform proper studies at university then there really is a valid and rational case to argue that things we now consider to be superstition and impossible are simply natural functions of this universal system we only rarely come across.
The key is the state of mind. And the only way to be convinced is to try and see for yourself. I think this is a very laudable interest intelligent people can research in tandem with whatever more Romanesque pursuit they have to play along with to survive in this material world. I certainly have found nothing more worthy of my attention.
Hope some of this was useful or at least interesting.
Hope and Love
)
Happy Tree
A lot of people are commenting on how they think their IQ is too high for everyone else. IQ is relative. Maybe their social IQ is a low 80.
“Happiness in intelligent people is the rarest thing I know”
– Ernest Hemingway
Life can be substantially different as based in a matter of perspective. Find passion in life, whether its in something current or move along to something else.
The only problem with this is that discovery in and of itself ends up becoming the passion…
Still searching.
Just a quick note on IQ.
As far as I am aware, there are actually multiple standards for determining IQ.
Depending on the standard, an IQ of 140 in the USA may not be the same as the 140 IQ of some in the EU as each standard has a different mean.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/IQ
I think it is valid to think that people writing the comments to this blog mean generally smart people, both intellectually and socially, when talking about high IQ and not numbercrunchers who can’t dress themselves.
No wonder, a cubicle job.. that has got to be one of the worst options out there.
Anyway, if you are smart, you may have figured out how come with 5000 in the account, you still “cannot afford” a night out costing €70. Ie its all about income, not liquidity.
Thus you should end up with some rather nice savings, as roman spending habits just dont matter.. brittney spears cd? Bah, ill get bach for a tenth the price and 20 times better!
Liquidity is only spent on large scale goods, not every day spending.
Savings ultimately allow for a simpler life, once a home is owned, you can cut costs significantly. Same with travel, be that a 10yo car, buspass or bicycle. Theres plenty of nice lil simple recipies out there, giving highly nutritious food (sole purpose to eat). Funny thing is, best foods rarely cost more than €2/day.
This ultimately allows for a significantly lower income, and thus less slavery to rome. Heck, start flipping burgers on weekends as a offtime job, working say another day or two in the office or with something else granting perhaps another €500 -> €1000/month.
You could be surprised at the number of misplaced geniuses at McD
Which brings us to the center of it all, yourself. Yes, a lot more time with your own miserable you. If you cannot stand yourself, you are best of as a roman. But if you can.. well, one lil trick ive discovered: grow muscles. No not like a overgrown ahnold, just rock hard all over, bulging a bit here and there.
Then start sweating, and eating your daily 1,5g of protein per kg of bodymass.
http://hundredpushups.com/ is a good start.
That will improve your life greatly. A healthy mind can only dwell in a healthy body. Think about that
As for life being pointless, really..
) is fun, and even better when the both of you are toned and fit. Better yet, you can be blessed with a little one.. to whom you can teach all kinds of things, play with etc.
The ultimate aim for any organism is to perpetuate itself. Sex, ive heard (
Then give him or her a sibling
Since ultimately down history, noone cares if you had a big house or lots of money.. even whether or not you had read 2000 books, what does matter is offspring. Surviving ones, that is.
Oh yes, and then we have the definition of the free man.. from rome and beyond: Owning a horse and a weapon. Horse obviously is any way to travel (pretty much = car), and weapon is a gun in these days.
With freedom and health, and a stable if humble income and the little ones. Oh and all the time to enjoy this, and voila, you are free of the roman lifestyle.
They pretty much will resent you for this, think you are insane of whatever. You should be above all that.
Finally, a list of prequisite characteristics needed to develop your inner self, taken from dear Herr Steiner:
* Control over one’s own thinking
* Control over one’s will
* Composure
* Positivity
* Impartiality
Two first demands a rejection of THEIR values. Next, is coming to peace with yourself. Impartiality comes from understanding the pointlessness of lies and the first two.. questioning and rejecting the imposed roman values. Positivity, well, being healthy helps as does redirecting your expectations of life. Perhaps a bit of a childs mind helps, view life from a little childs point of view sometimes
And perhaps you can rediscover life. Maybe.
Oh yeah.. and dont watch tv ever again. Its so full of lies, brainwashing (no matter how aware you are, it seeps thru), case in point: “motherfucker”, should be a awfully outrageously rude word.. but you likely dont mind as much as say with the in real terms less obnoxious, “I smear myself in dog shit and eat it too!”, why? You have been conditioned that way.
as for average or not iq, remember that a lot of tests pander to the egoes of wannabe smarts. Ive found tests where the result need to be divided by 1,2 or 1,4 even.
One test did give a accurate one, and lots of people mortally hurt with their iq 89 results, having imagined their whole lives they had an iq of 115.
Sorry, no link.
This i believe is the sole accurate test on a test, see if you can by answering in a stupid fashion get below 80. If you cannot, the test is fatally flawed.
The lowest should be 30-40, by answering everything wrong.
That said, tests have handed me everything from 128 to 189.
Oh and the occasional 70-105 (bah!), when ive tested the tests.
Equality, or the notion thereof, is the worst bane out there.
Have a look at what the declaration really says tho
Few if any sites on the net carry it, you have to go there in person to read.. to realize how much you have been lied to.
Thank you for writing the article.
@ Vero – You’re welcome…
If you’re truly intelligent, you’re never bored. You realize that “happiness” isn’t a constant but moments.
If you’re truly intelligent, you know how to have fun.
If you’re truly intelligent, you do good works.
If you’re truly intelligent, you see wonder all around you.
What would you say to a smart person who has given up, devotes all their time to drinking and doesn’t know how to quit?
Smart people that are ‘creatives’ have few of the problems mentioned above. They are busy trying to stay alive by creating things from nothing.
Happiness, veritas and Teotw, you three have just given one reader some new reasons to try and carry on. Thank you! I was just about to give up myself.
Don’t you guys realize that the level of communication in this thread far exceeds that of places common people hang out, like youtube and myspace?
The quality of these comments does in fact show that everyone in here is above average intelligence, and you don’t need an IQ test or any other subjective test to show that.
What you’ve said is so true.
It’s interesting to see people like yourself recognizing this dynamic in this modern age, again. In the 1800s and early 1900s, such models like this were discussed by “the elite.” And you can see how this kind of proposition would really grate on the ears of 90% of people (those you call “romans”). They consider it to be simply a declaration by aristocrats that they are superior to the rest of folks. In that manner, “common” became a perjorative term; but it was not originally meant to be a derogatory term.
The thing is, that if deep thinking folks don’t see this truism which you laid out here clearly, they are going to be really foolish in how they approach life. One key point you mention here, is that moment when these thinkers realize that they would rather engage their minds than be working in a boring job. That means smart people tend to drop out of mainstream society; and they will even choose to live hand to mouth, just working enough to get by in whatever odd jobs they can find, to help them keep their head above water; they’ll try to get themselves on welfare, or on social security disability payments. Money is not the thing they are zealous about. They want their time for their own endeavors. Money and time are both resources which can be spent. And whereas most folks value the things they can spend their money on – deep thinkers profoundly value the things that they spend their time on.
There are some other things which cause smart people to often get dejected and unhappy. One interesting effect, is that even though they see themselves as living up to the highest standards – when it comes to how they converse, and how they act socially… the “Romans” actually more often than not scorn these smart people who are always talking in terms of outside-the-box perspectives and premises. We have to recognize this as well. Philosophical thinkers are scorned, because they part ways with the prevalent consensuses of their society in so many ways; they assess every issue from an independent perspective. One old story which provided an avenue to discuss and muse about this effect was Plato’s “allegory of the cave.”
One interesting effect which I wrote about last week on my weblog, is that it’s often the case that smart people will also be nurturing people. Because they have thought things through enough – they understand how social trends come into existence, and move and affect people in small and large groups; these folks will seek to focus almost entirely on encouraging these trends when they are around others. So, where we could divide the world up into “smart folks” and “Romans,” or “deep thinkers” and “shallow thinkers” – it might be more instructive to see the division between “nurturers” and “posturers.” I believe that smart people need to focus intently on hooking up with those who are nurturers. And indeed, I think that if you see a smart person who is expecially bitter – something is oddly incongruous in that situation, and one would be wise to give that situation some healthy berth, as you puzzle out what’s happening. Dedicating your life to consoling Eyeore is going to end up being just as vain a pursuit as working a dead end job.
The weblog post I wrote last week about posturers and nurturers is here.
And there is another very fascinating post I discovered on the same tangent about posturing and role playing, which was written by Dave Pollard.
So, I agree with you that smart people should “get out of Rome.” What that means, is that they have to build social networks with folks who do respect them, and their ideas… and who understand their rhythms of life, and who will forgive their weaknesses.
There’s a portuguese poet and writer called Fernando Pessoa, an intellectual himself, a writer something like the Shakespeare of the portuguese language. He was a very intelligent and tormented man, frequently depressed, who wrote once that knowledge and intelligence are traps that will void people from being truly happy. For him, happiness lies on simple things and people with intelligence will ever question simple things as they were not enough to fullfil happiness.
I always thoughted like that but as time passes I try to admire the simple things and see their trully value.
Hi there,
Read your article and was a bit uneased by it.
It’s not so much the “them” against “us”… it’s more about framing… Because I think you got it wrong.
“Romans” at the end of the day, gave what they had to give. Thus their satisfaction. “We” who have receive “more”… we have to give “more”. When we feel uneased by all this, it’s “simply” because we are not doing what we are meant to. Not in our place. Not doing what is “required” of us. Unhappy, simply because we are not giving as much as our internal measure asks us of.
Go out and shine!
“Get out of Rome!”
Get out of Rome??
If we are so smart then why don’t we? I’d like to see a smart person figure out what it is that you have to do so that you don’t end up having to “live to work to live”.
Unfortunately, the world is run by idiots, and the system they came up with is: you work to make money.
Even if you’re smart enough to see the stupidity of that, you still need to play.
You cannot get out of Rome. Rome is all there is!
This is how I feel every day, please tell me how to get out of Rome!
@ Liz – What do you love?
i always wondered why its so hard for me to keep a job like everyone else. i mean you go to work to pay for a house that you barely even live in because you’re always working to pay for it! then you die and others take your place, slaving away to dreams of happiness and success. life is just a pursuit of happiness… and i guess im just a little too slow for everyone else…
I just see bored people speaking about how smart they are. Sorry u’re just bored.
When I got out of high school I started working “mundane” jobs, and I hated it, i was very bored and was very unhappy. This was because the jobs I had to do were not a challenge for me. So you know what I did? I got off my lazy ass and went to college. Now I’m studying for a degree in a field that I do find interesting and challenging. So if your so tired with you job and so bored ans so miserable why don’t you make a change in your life. Go to college, earn a degree in an interesting and challenging subject. That’s what the happy and successful “smart” people do.
@ Derek – Like your name
Besides that though, you detect the futility of the mainstream efforts. The only response to that that I know of is to charge off and conquer more challenging things; to maximize your talents in pursuit of things worthy of your abilities because, as you’ve noticed, living to work to live, just doesn’t cut it for most of us. Good luck. You and I are allies, Sir.
@ mike – sniff.
@ Utarinsysi – You’re absolutely right here. Smart people must charge off and do challenging, more rewarding things. I commend your efforts and achievements.
An IQ of 140 merely says you can hold more information than some people can, which is probably why if you’ve got an IQ of 140 you understand things better because you can hold onto that information a lot easier. The average IQ of a human is around 100-115ish, and i know an IQ of 140 sounds very impressive given that information, but it means absolutely NOTHING if you dont use it. I’ve got an IQ of 147 but that doesnt make me any better than anyone else…
This whole thing is just ridiculous, i’m sure there are only a few people who dont really think about the future in any way at all and just live life without questioning anything at all…
so who’s the smartest?
This is all very interesting, obviously, but no one is going to give you the solution or answer you desire.
I challenge each of you bored clever people to achieve something that tests your intelligence before the week is out. I expect to hear about your results. Am i allowed to say a thing like that in one of these?
Point being, you all have thought looooong and hard about this for years. Time to ease up on the thinking and just do something, don’t you think. The world belongs to you. Decide upon the rules and start playing. Tick tock, it’s a gift that most defiantly expires.
@ smart dude – One of the most interesting things about this article is that I never mentioned IQ, but in the comments, IQ has been mentioned relentlessly. If we are talking about IQ, then it has a lot more to do about a lot of things than just how much information one can hold. That’s just the nature of a an IQ test.
However, you’re right about this: being smart means nothing unless you do something with it. Finding what that is that still retains significant meaning for smart people is the challenge that justifies happiness in a life where most things just don’t satisfy the challenges that smart peoples’ minds seem to demand, whether they know it or not.
@ nizzle – Who do you think?
@ Mark – You’re more than welcome to say anything you wish, which is why the comments are always unmoderated. I appreciate all input. And you’re right, no one can hand the magic solution to anyone. Least of all me, if that’s what you’re referring to. That said, my aim here was to ultimately inspire people to understand their surroundings and to do something about it. Which would seem to make our views compatible.
The best thing you’ve got here is this. It’s the golden rule for smart people:
And on the tick tock: that is the epic and fundamental instruction that should govern us all.
No not aimed at you, at all of us, though i certainly wouldn’t classify myself as particularly smart. Though i can spot inspiration when i read it. Thanks for the post.
your life is pointless on the grand scale, all that you have worked for today will be lost due to an event out of your control; suicide makes everything better. kill yourself.
First of all the average IQ is 100 because of the definition of IQ itself. It is a way to gauge how well you do on a test compared to others. Comparing IQ does not hold much weight unless you took the SAME test as another person. Furthermore most tests are not designed to gauge high IQ. Past 130 you need specialized tests for higher range IQ to have any accuracy. To the one who said an IQ of 140 is common – uh NO, no it is not.
To all the mensa folks – talking on end about some boring aspect of something you learned in school – is the same as them talking on about what they saw on TV. Nothing original just regurgitating facts to each other.
If you are really smart you should have figured out a way to be happy by now – most of you are in the work force already.
No matter what your IQ is, whether you are a ‘Roman’ or an idiot who thinks he is better than everyone else, the same thing is true: looking into the eyes of your child makes you realise the meaning of life and key to happiness, is NOTHING to do with intelligence. You are never bored when gazing at your baby fast asleep. Hardly intellectually taxing. Just bliss.
Liz
Judging by the way people drive, the average IQ is in single digits.
Frank Johnson´s last blog post..Obstacles Are Opportunities
Hi,
I think a lot of this discussion is about how to find meaning in life given that one sticks out a lot from the average in society. I like a suggestion for happiness I heard on TED.com:
“Find something more important than you and dedicate your life to it. ”
Now this takes humilty to accept, which doesnt naturally correlate with intelligence. One of the problems of being significantly smarter than most people around one is that one is, visibly, special and often has the marks of the outcast to prove it.
Outcasts are not usually very good at finding things more important than themselves and dedicating their lives to them…partly because “more important things” usually involve the majority of people in society, who, kind of by definition, are not part of their tribe!
So happiness depends in part on integrating into society which, for the very smart, consists for the greatest part of people who are less intelligent (and hence are tempting to think of as “inferior” at some level) than they are. So I see one of the key issues as: how does a smart person integrate and become part of a society mostly dumber than they are, while at the same time not loosing self-esteem as a result or denying who they are?
Just my 2c!
@ Anon – Right.
@ Ilia – Not sure I can agree on everything you’ve said here, accept the 100 mark as the IQ mean. Figuring out happiness is as much an obstacle to intelligent peop;e as it is for everyone else.
@ Liz – Are you calling me an idiot?
No one said intelligence had anything to do with happiness. In fact, my experience has been the opposite, at least at times. Happiness seems especially elusive whereas for most of the people I’ve met in life, it seems easier. I only wrote this to articulate the difficulties people like me can face.
@ Frank – This might be true
@ Bruce – I think you’ve said it perfectly. Finding something really worth one’s salt is the ultimate goal. And for smart people, they might have to go looking harder. Sometimes a lot harder.
Excellent piece – I think you capture and convey well the feelings of a significant portion of the population. And of course you have stirred a lot of controversy with your explicit grouping of ’smart’ ( reads defensively as ‘better’) and ‘not smart’. Anyone who perceives themself in the latter group will probably feel insulted. Veritas has some nice comments there.
I think there is basically one criterion for Success: create something good or destroy something bad.
(Btw, be Really careful about that second one.)
Here’s the Problem: you will probably not Succeed at a 9-5, at least not anytime soon.
That’s because a 9-5 not designed for Success, it’s designed for Stability. Decent income, minimal risk. And let’s face it, creation and destruction are risky! But with that risk comes greater potential reward. Wealth doesn’t just appear, it has to be created (natural resources being the blatant exception).
So if you want out, you need to plan for risk. That means saving of course, but it also means communicating your plans to those around you. Finding partners and supporters is every bit as important having the idea in the first place.
Just don’t fall into the trap of not engaging people because you don’t have one yet. Your brilliant idea will be a variation of someone else’s idea.
@ Lewis – Remarkable comment. I think you’re right on in all respects. The problem with the 9-5 ritual is stability and not necessarily creativity, growth and development. Kudos to you.
Also, thanks for the link from your blog. I’ve bookmarked it and will dig in with greater depth soon.
You guys seem to assume that all the dullards out there are happy. They are not happy. You walk alone past a group of laughing, goofy, social fools and you think to yourself “Lucky them, they have everything.”
You don’t know these people. You don’t know their private intimate thoughts. They may be slower or less insightful, but they have the same problems we clever folk do. They are, for the most part, uncomfortable and insecure. Just because for the hour that you see them they come off as happy doesn’t mean they don’t have their own personal torments.
To the idiots who said that life is basically pointless, you can’t prove that so stop asserting it. You don’t know, and neither do I, so let’s all just do our best and see what happens.
Good luck in your endeavours.
[...] out of nowhere Why Smart People are Unhappy got completely lit up. And I mean completely. One day traffic on that article alone surpassed all [...]
The author of this article presumably thinks he’s very smart, but I thought it was kind of dumb specifically because there doesn’t seem to be any correlation with IQ and happiness in the studies that have actually looked at that.
What this article perhaps does suggest is a link between unhappiness and arrogance. If you spend your life with this sort of elitist view that classifies most of the population as little more than dullard zombies, no wonder you’re not very happy.
OTOH, I wouldn’t call that very samrt.
@ dude – Are all “dullards” happy? Hell no. We all know that. Can they find baseline satisfaction more easily? Hell yes. American Idol and Budweiser my man. But, for the people for whom this article resonated, those just don’t cut it. The main point is that happiness is elusive in special kinds of ways for self-identified smart people.
And sure, we don’t know the private thoughts of the average Joes. And within those private thoughts might lie all kinds of unhappiness that even TV and beer might not solve. But ask them what might make them happy. The answers I get are usually things I wouldn’t say would make me happy.
@ Brian – The author. You mean me? Do I think I’m smart? You bet. Arrogant? Take a break man. Relax. Only arrogant to you. Sorry.
Good article, thanks.
@ Mr A – Thank you
I can relate to what you are saying completely.
My solution is know thyself. Try to look for happiness every moment. Nature out there is great source of inspiration. What also helps is cultivation of some endless quest to mastery such as martial arts (my personal choice is Qi Gong). You get out of Rome b traveling inward, kind of, with some sharing of your energy ebullience to the Romans, and they will not be unhappy about that… As far as the limitations of human (’Roman’) activities go, it’s tricky… Just try to express your creativity wherever you can, I guess. Kepp your sense of humor!
I definitely enjoyed the article. It seems to me that the first half of the posted comments are from people who seek a smarter person to tell them what to do.
Just to share real quick… out of necessity, I got a corporate job and lucked out to get an office with a window (and not a cube!)–which I share with another individual. One chilly morning, I rode my bicycle to work and when my office mate asked how the ride was, I commented that it was invigorating. Bewildered, my office mate couldn’t grasp the meaning of the word, which I found a bit frustrating. Incidentally, the learning curve at the job was about a week for me. I’m quitting this Friday. I cannot continue the mindnumbing work as it is commensurate with accepting mediocrity.
It’s nice and comforting to read your article and to relate. It’s one thing to be smart or clever or possess a large lexicon with which you can dazzle “The Romans”(I love that as an analogy) or to apply yourself and become ’successful’, whatever the hell that is, but another to become ‘wise’.
I may be wrong, but I don’t think the modern WASP work ethic rewards ‘wise’.
if you were truly wise however, you wouldn’t care.
I’ll let you know if I ever make it myself!
Great articles! There was one thing left out though. The other vise of smart people versus “romans” is that they shut themselves out. The key to every day happiness is to loose the hangups and look for the charm in everybody.
I believe the core of the problem is being left out. Smart people are much more complex in thought. Not only do they think more elaborately, but they feel and see the world in a more complex nature. This being said, we are more apt to take all of these observations, future inklings, and events from the past that relate to an issue and apply them to our analysis. And if someone is being honest with themselves… the world isn’t all flowers and rainbows, and we see that. On the other hand, we also yearn for more and are satiated with less than the simple man’s world. We are the future; they are the now. We invent; they use what’s been invented… etc.
it helps just to hear some of my own thoughts and feelings mirrored by other people,i think its important to realise that some people that think like this can’t change things without the support of likeminded people,after all if we aren’t roman what are we? could we all be the greeks and if so shouldn’t we all be talking together in our own language with our own behaviours.
i would love to find a way to get word to more people and bring them together so that we could all gain from each other and not only find a way to be happy,but also to live upto our potentials,after all if anyone is going to make the world better,surely its us?
thank you for posting this,it was really nice and enlivening to read.
(i hope i didn’t stretch the roman/greek analogy,it was just too tempting)
In my opinion, Jim’s post is very insightful. To respond, I think the best way to accomplish was Jim stated is to organize our thoughts better. Perhaps Dereck can find a way to make this more of a thread-style, where responses and conversations can build off of specific replies.
@ Vis – Nicely put, especially with your take on nature and humor
@ Jon R – I feel for you on many levels. Learning curves that last one week are very telling. Hope you find something remarkable.
@ Neil – It’s nice to have readers who can relate. I hope you do let us know f you make it. Good luck to you.
@ Stephan – that is a great challenge indeed. Worthy of significant effort.
@ Jenna – I can definitely see where you’re coming from on the complexity side of the issue.
@ Jim – This is a fantastic addition to the analogy. It illuminates a fundamental problem that I’ve seen (don’t want to speak for everyone); just finding the right kinds of friends.
@ Jon R – I’ve got a forum installed, though only a few people have signed up for it in these first few months of this blog. If there’s enough interest, I’ll copy this entire thread over to it.
thank you Jon R and dereck i’m flattered you even noticed to be honest,i don’t normally comment on these things but this article really touched a nerve with me,in a good way obviously,I know what you mean about the friends Dereck but thats quite a good point in itself,i’m sure all of us on here have friends that we would consider very evolved or to at least have open minds and if we all have friends like us,then there must be so many more likeminded people to meet,i wish there was a place on the net where we could share ideas and start projects which would start out improving things for us,but i imagine would then snowball into more and more. the forum is a good idea and i will take my tired brain to the task of signing up for it.
thanks again you both made me feel cleverer than i deserve and thanks for writing the article in the first place its really good,i’m a fan
@ Jim – That my friend, is why I’m on the Internet in the first place
Hey, if you’re bored sometime: Check out the forum. Someday it should get pretty crowded. However, this blog is just a few months old so still has lots of room up.
Thanks for all the insight.
My way to happiness is to stop thinking that much, and start learning more. I think we create our own world, so the more mater we absorb, the bigger our world becomes.
Things you need on your path is:
1 good health
2 peace of mind
3 a labour of love of choice
3 freedom of fear and worries
4 a positive mental attitude
5 sex
The prices to pay for not fulfilling them is:
1 ill health
2 fear and worries
3 indecision and doubt
4 frustration and discouragement in live
5 blue balls
you need to form a clear picture in your mind of your absolute desire in live, and if you can’t, you got your answer. It’s to find that out, by all means and terms.
Who said it was going to be short and easy road. But be glad and happy, you finally got yourself an ultimate challenge worth of your own intellect. Remember to keep on looking forwards knowing that happiness lies behind you
two things i encourage is
1 leaving Rome
2 creating something good or destroy something bad. witch falls for me under a labour of love, i really want to try the hardcore way next time
grtzz
Just because you can’t find happiness doesn’t make you special.
I don’t mean that as an insult, I just get the inkling feeling like you’re convinced you’re part of a special, elitist club of people that are smarter than everyone else.
What about all the clever and smart people that can find happiness in the futility of everyday life? How come they can be happy and you can’t? Are you simply smarter and more creative than them?
What about those of us (like myself) that can easily acknowledge everything you’ve said in this article, yet still be happy? I don’t NAIVELY say “That’s what we Romans do!” For one, that implies that anyone who isn’t a part of your ‘club’ is naive, which is what makes you sound elitist. Secondly, it implies that it’s naive to accept things and just go with them, which just isn’t true.
@ corey
for me i don’t think we’re elitist cos we’re smart (i’m certainly not i’m a dyspraxic with an unimppressive IQ) i can see why you would think that though and maybe its just me,but the reason that i think makes us and kind of group isn’t our intelligence or any kind of superiority,its more becuase we are unhappy with what we see around us and in our own lives,which means we have more motivation to improve things,that to me is the most important thing and what binds us,not intelligence but a desire to see things better and to be better.
I don’t think it’s elitist at all. And I don’t think that all unhappy people are ’smart’ or that all ’smart’ people are unhappy.
I think the people that are most unhappy are those that have the tendancy to question everything. It just so happens that smarter people are more likely to question things. I don’t consider myself to be anything above average on the smart scale, but I am unhappy. And what makes me the most unhappy is thinking ‘what is the point’ to everything. And why. “why this” “why that” … Why are we here? Why is the universe here? Why do the things that exist exist in the first place? Is there a higher purpose and if not then what is the point?’
And this leads me into doing wreckless things with my own personal health and safety because I don’t see any harm in trying to prevent it. “What is the point?”
If we are merely a random string of dna then it’s not going to matter if you, I or anyone we know isn’t here. In 100, 1000, 10,000 years no one is going to be any the wiser. If the world suddenly didn’t exist tomorrow.. then no one would care. If the universe didn’t exist no one would care because there is no one around to care.
Which then of course makes me unhappy that I do things like that. It’s a vicious circle of apathy, feeling overwhelmed and alone, and self destruction.
Anyway. My theory is that having a certain way of thinking that leads to the tendancy to question your own existance is what leads to unhappiness and not necessarily intelligence itself.
(Also, just a thought.. it therefore would seem it is more likely that people who are not extremely religious are more likely to be unhappy as they are more likely to question their existance. A person who takes their religion very seriously would feel more secure in life if they ‘know’ that somewhere out there is a higher being taking care of things for them. Imagine it like a kid with a parent taking the responsibility. And I don’t mean that in a derrogatory way. I wish I could have unwavvering faith in something if I knew it would keep my head above the water. It’s by no means a bad thing. Just an observation.)
What do you reckon..?
On a completely different note..
All this debating between a lot of people has probably made some of us at least a little happier. The chance to put across your veiw and find likewise individuals.
Mass debating!
Who’d have thought something like that would make people happier!
Funny old world, eh’.
(p.s. yes there is a joke in there somewhere. Thought we could all do with cheering up. x)
@ ennio – You’ve got some great points here. I especially agree with your mentioning the need to form a clear picture of what it is you want in life.
@ Corey –
You’re being mean. This kind of attitude will get you nowhere, friend. It’s the kind of attitude I see in many places. It’s like when someone says, “Why should I help you, while there are people starving in Africa?” But the person asking the question is almost never off in Africa helping to feed people.
Who thinks we’re special? Apparently you do because you’ve associated the unhappiness discussed in the article with an elitism you do not feel party to. I’m sorry.
@ Jim – I agree. The elitism detected by others here doesn’t feel like elitism to me. To me it’s just a harmony among friends. Like guys gettin’ along while watching a football game. Just some harmony. Nothing more than that.
@ Stephy – You’ve hit on something crucial here with your bit on questioning. If critical thinking people start asking things like, “Why is this?” or “What does this mean?” or “Is this important?” then after a while they might have fewer things to rely on that have meaning for many other people, which is really what the article was after.
As to the religion question: Yes, something firm must replace the foundations that support the “everything’s ok” faith that comes from having faith. I know what that firm thing is. What do you reckon it could be?
Oh and, loved the joke
Haha i’m glad you liked the joke. I was worried I may ruin any credibility I may have gotton from my previous post. But apparently not. Thank you! x
It seems to me that smart by definition is having an abundance of knowledge. I think smart people who are happy know how to use this knowledge. This is wisdom. Smart people who are unhappy have an abundance of knowledge without knowing how to use it. It’s the same in the money game too. I have lots of money, but what do I do with it? Having it does not make one happy. Using it does.
Money or Knowledge.
@ AC – This is good, but calls to mind William James’ pragmatism. I prefer Descartes’ definition.
And I only say this because money has a character to it that invokes a certain fraudulence. But that’s just me.
ah yes, more knowledge. Knowledge from others with knowledge.
Alas, how does your preference gain wisdom for the rest of us?
I will learn more about Descartes definition. I may even understand it.
Money is fraudulent on more than certain levels usually, but then so is knowledge, unless we share it, not take it.
@ AC – That’s the problem. Hence the e-mail.
Define for me the specifics regarding “the rest of us” and I’ll likely tell you that we just snuck down into the rabbit’s hole.
For Descartes’ version, find the beginning paragraph of Discourse on the Method.
Lastly, I’ll end on this: knowledge that holds no fraudulence depends entirely upon the “whom” to which we are speaking; hence all the esotericism here.
That unfraudulent knowledge is the holy grail. At least for those who reside in the “specifics” I just referred to.
Cheers.
@ AC
now i don’t know descartes and im not incredibly well educated (which maybe just illustrates my point) but it seems to me you are confusing intelligence and knowledge on a basic level,they are two very seperate things that simply lend themselves well to each other.
@ Jim – I have to agree on a separation of knowledge and intelligence. And, just as you say, that they lend each other very important things.
My point of view is, that truly intelligent persons are always auto-didactive, and therefore upon there quest to find the answer to life, the universe, and everything, they should at least have heard about “Cogito ergo sum” (”I think, so I am”) and for rejecting Aristoteles philosophy and introducing a new rational approach.
Ps: the answer, it’s 42
OK, you’re starting to freak me out a little. Not two weeks ago I wrote most of these thoughts down in my notebook as the first part of trying to figure out what I need to do for the rest of my life. They’re right there as a stream-of-consciousness examination of, “What’s ‘wrong’ with me” and how to figure work-arounds. Common threads of some pretty diverse jobs I’ve had that I have liked, though, are becoming more evident. Anyhow, congratulations on not being a waste of bandwidth on teh Interwebs like about 95 percent of “bloggers” out there. Good on you.
After the week i have had this rings so true. I’m waiting on a promotion that should start this thursday but still not 100% convinced I will be in place on thursday morning due to various factors. Been working on it for 2 years and seriously questioning myself why I am so frustrated doing what I am currently doing, this puts it into a simple straight forward way of thinking.
Thanks for the post
Wayne
Wayne´s last blog post..Only Fools and Horses Complete Video Clips – Funniest Ever!
@ ennio – 42
What’s interesting here is that I wonder how many people, smart or even otherwise, already are satisfied with the meaning of life. What then?
@ Jack – Interesting. What are your long-term goals? Finding the route to those events is always the tricky part.
@ Wayne – I know what you mean. The promotions are good, but is yours, as mine often are, means to other ends? Mine always have been, and because of that, they never feel as good as they could otherwise.
This post is a great too. I’ll have to read the next one now. Maybe you could add a link at the bottom of each to the next one in the series.
I’d also like to add that most of this seems to be work related, but from my experience it extends into personal life as well.
As you did say it’s hard to find non roman friends. I have a few, and I hang on to them for dear life. But what’s even harder is relationships.
I won’t go on about my personal experience there, except to say that it’s not easy, as a non roman, to find a girl who’s attractive, equally non roman, and actively looking to date, who hasn’t been snapped up already as the rarity she is.
@ Trav – I’ve been planning on adding a “related posts” section to this blog for a few weeks now. Good thinking; I think it would be useful.
As to this all being equally meaningful both in an out of the work place, I think you’re absolutely right. This discussion is applicable in many areas of life, whether school, home or otherwise.
As to the girl you’re talking about: There’s only one woman on the face of globe that meets this standard, and sorry, I already married her.
Ok, but really, they are out there. I hope you can find her…
@ derek:
Euhm yeah sure, those people are just called mentally depressed :-p
Firstly, I have enjoyed this post very, so thank you.
Secondly, I would only like to express an idea, i’m not even sure its my opinion, i hope thats not considered out of line.
The post correlates unhappiness with intelligence, while there is an obvious correlation they are not mutually exclusve, perhaps the reason “deeper thinkers” are inclined to unhappiness is because of their ability to think to love or want beyond happiness.
Perhaps what we can love or really want beyond “shallow thinkers” is not happiness itself, but the desire of happiness.
It seems to me that many commentators are confusing the idea of complacency with happiness. The idea that average individuals are happy is an erroneous one at best. Though some are happy with their current lifestyles, most are just complacent in living a bovine life.
Intellectually developed individuals are only one of the many types of people in the world. Just like for some the ideas of introspection, philosophy, and thinking are fascinating. There are others who are content with living within the constrains of daily life.
Both views are valid, and do not merit disparaging from either end.
Toleration is one important key factor to consider. For some intelligent individuals asceticism seems like the way of living. To others, more extroverted minds, a gregarious existence is far more enjoyable.
Life is full of variety, that is what makes it interesting, and thus we have to be versatile and convivial enough to appreciate every spectrum of it.
Remember that there are many types of intelligence. Accept that fact and you will start living a more placid existence.
Ultimately happiness is within our own psych. The idea that because one is intelligent and intellectually gifted a life of unhappiness is assured is not correct.
Carlos Perea´s last blog post..The Importance of Nutrition
i agree with ryan comment number 2. i’m actually quite astonished that another human being could feel exactly as i do every day of my life. and to put it all into words. excellent!! from what i’ve gathered reading your articles on smart people, i really just have to suck it up, and just learn to live in rome. i’m not a roman, nor will i ever be. but to be “successful” on this planet, i’m just going to have to pretend to be one.
@ Ennio – I’m laughing now because I was referring to me
@ “go for” – Interesting that you mention the possibility of a correlation. I was actually hoping to avoid a direct one. I don’t want to assume that smart people are unhappy, or to say that smart people are unhappy because they are smart, but rather, the smart people who are unhappy might be unhappy for at least some of these reasons. I’m glad you noticed.
@ Carlos – I like where you started your your comment. Complacency is not happiness, for normal folks, but, just as you’ve said, it might cause unhappiness in a smarter individual.
Ultimately, this could be key: smart people might mistake normal, complacent people as being happy, and then they might hate complacency and feel unhappy in a world where complacency is the norm. This opens up all kinds of new doors: Ditch happiness, and start by seeking a non-conforming attitude that abandons complacency and seeks achievement that is relevant and meaningful on a scale that corroborates with a smart person’s self-perception. The happiness might just catch up then.
Your respect for the variety of humanity impresses me deeply. It’s the variety that makes human history so damned worthwile.
@ “not ryan” – I struggle with this frequently. I too want to succeed, but often find myself not wanting to do it on these terms. The trick? Succeed briefly, but maybe in a big way, then find an island.
Dereck, I believe deeply that happiness is a relative term that is too loosely tied to money, power, and material possessions by our society. Individuals might respond to this with a very banal response like “We live in a materialistic world.”
Although that is true, we have to realize as well that there are many other powers and forces acting on the universe that we pusillanimous humans cannot even begin to comprehend.
The least we can do then is to help each other to achieve the highest level of wisdom possible.
Those who have been blessed with a more capable mind should start sharing their abilities for the improvement of humanity, instead of keeping it all to themselves.
You are not judged by your thoughts, after all, thoughts are private and only the person thinking them knows their existence. It is only when we act and make them tangible that people around appreciate our perspicuity.
Don’t late your mind go to waste; do something productive with it!
Carlos Perea´s last blog post..Cancer Through the Eyes of a Teenager
Nice post, I especially related to this:
They comprehend the futility of their situations
Yes! Or, as Lily Tomlin put it,
“Reality is the leading cause of stress among those in touch with it.”
Other thoughts inspired by comments here:
Isn’t there a definition of nihilism that goes something like, “Do everything as if it matters intensely, while realizing fully that none of it matters at all”?
The suicide one: One of my favorite songs (in college days when I first got deeply in touch with the angst of being surrounded by folks who seemed to utterly lack any sort of intellectual curiosity whatsoever): Don’t Try Suicide
Also at that time wrote my own little angsty ditty to the tune of Wouldn’t it be Loverly (from My Fair Lady):
All I want is an empty head
So I’ll sleep when I go to bed
No thoughts to bother me
Now, wouldn’t it be loverly …
Thanks for this place to vent the spleen, Dereck
Ok, I’m definitely riding a hobby horse here, (or soapbox if you prefer, though they don’t ride very well), but this:
if you were truly wise however, you wouldn’t care.
Again with the assumption that we can change emotions with thoughts.
I contend that people who think this way have it backwards. The emotions come _first_, then the spin doctor of the logical brain. The emotions are merely indicators, like the gauges on your dashboard – needs gas, needs oil, needs water, etc.
We CARE because we need the approval of other humans. Period. Ever heard of something called shunning? We may think that in our oh-so-advanced fancy technological world, not fitting in is no big deal because we can just get on the big ‘web and hook up with virtual folks anywhere on the planet.
But you know what? It jest ain’t the _same_ as being part of an ongoing, daily community where you are perceived as important, special, having a particular role and purpose to play – the storyteller, the healer, the teacher, what have you.
In our gigantic, formless blobs of so-called civilization, most of us get lost. Sure, we work, and we may be part of some kind of nominal ‘family’, but where’s the shared sense of purpose, that we’re all creating something together and that each individual’s contribution matters to the survival of the whole?
Eh, this is too big to fit here. Need to start my own blog and stop hogging comments. Or, maybe go over to the forum, just remembered about that.
Smartlings Unite!
@ Carlos – What a well thought out comment. Bravo! What I like to label what you’ve said here is a moral imperative. In other words, I agree with much of what you’ve said, as well as the conclusion. Given the things we have, ought we then move on them in an outward fashion, turning our skills toward the world to work on its problems? I’m in the camp that says, “Yes we should.”
@ grasshopper – Nihilism is often a consequence of atheism, at least for most atheists. It certainly was for me at one point. The emergence from nihilism came at the moment when nothing did matter after all, from an objective or fully scientific perspective. At that moment, the creation of what matters is suddenly a freedom. That freedom is actually Carlos’ moral imperative.
On your bit about emotions versus logic. I’ve often wondered about this. Ultimately, I think emotions can largely be controlled through the use of reason. However, I also believe that most people have an emotional level that is intrinsic; and that a high emotional level does not prevent the use of highly advanced reason. They can be emotional and extremely rational both at the same time. Oh and please, feel free to hog my comments
@ Smartacus – You have the tattoo, right?
Everybody thinks they’re smart, because we can’t crawl into another brain and compare the two. We exaggerate our areas of mental precision, and we downplay our shortcomings saying “well I’m smart when it comes too…”.
Everyone else is doing the same thing.
This world of sad, neurotic fucks wakes up every morning and pretends they’re the smart, different, rounded one, in a world of flat characters.
Make friends, have fun, and don’t take shit so fucking seriously if you want to be happy. Don’t just blame it on some self righteous “I’m just too smart” bullshit.
Nice post. Haven’t read the third one yet. Dereck, it’s rad that you take the time to respond to everyone.
One of my problems (and something that I’m surprised hasn’t come up in the comments here or in the first post) is that because I do see things in a bigger picture (though certainly not the biggest), I recognize that many of the things that other people do to achieve “happiness” are actively destroying the planet. ie. Many people seek happiness in consumerism (which many consumers recognize is not true happiness), but consumerism is part of what has led us to our very precarious environmental situation. And yet, people keep buying.
While I can definitely get behind the idea that happiness should be everyone’s goal, seeking happiness should be condemned if (for example) killing people is how someone finds it.
As for the nihilism/meaninglessness that comes with atheism, I’ve recently started thinking that the key to living a good life is in embracing the idea that there is no god, and no immortal soul (or at least living as if there isn’t one). If a soul exists, then murder and suicide themselves lose meaning – the only thing that’s dying is our bodies. And by the same token, the existence of a soul effectively makes daily suffering meaningless, because as soon as this life ends, we’ve got an eternity of … well, something else to look forward to.
However, if there is NO soul, then the unique, thinking, socializing life that exists in each person is irreplaceable, and therefore unquantifiably precious. It doesn’t matter if thoughts arise as a result of chemical processes that follow certain rules. The fact that we’re all having this conversation at all indicates that thought and life has value, and is worth keeping around.
I haven’t thought out all the details yet, and I can’t write them all here, but that’s the gist of it.
[...] smart people fail are unhappy and why people dont like smart people. Three great articles that say exactly how I feel sometimes, [...]
I found what you wrote intriguing and quite new. There is hope- I love the work I do and the challenges I face every day to keep thinking creatively alongside holding knowledge.
When Liz asked how to get out of Rome, you replied: ‘What do you love?’
This is somewhat akin to ‘finding’ your passion. How do you answer a person who doesn’t love anything – that finds everything futile? Are the Buddhists who find enlightenment in nothingness, or the Hindu guru’s who do something similar to be admired or rejected?
How exactly does one find one’s pash? I’ve done some searching online and there is precious little in the way of useful information about it. Following hard on the heels of a lack of passion and the feeling of intense boredom is a lack of motivation. To be motivated one has to feel some kind of connection to what one is doing. No passion, boredom, no motivation – a pretty vicious cycle that could lead to depression, frustration, and anger.
People, even smart intelligent people need hope. Without it death and suicide become reasonable options. There is something innate that screams that life should have meaning and purpose, that suicide and death are unreasonable and wrong. Victor Frankl wrote about man’s search for meaning, yet he failed to provide a mechanism to find that meaning.
There is meaning ‘out there’ or ‘in here’ but do we believe it?
Religion is brilliant. You are never alone, everything has a purpose, and the fear of death is greatly diminished. If you believe in hell it even helps you to behave in a manner that benefits society as a whole. Just don’t ever try to take someone’s religion away from them; it’s one of the worst things you can do. Leave harmless people alone.
For kicks, my recent mental exercise/torment has been an attempt to determine the full context in which I exist. Now that I think about it, I suppose it really boils down to the continuity of our existence, though I hate using works like that, and whether the seeming continuity is really just a convenient illusion imposed on us by our brains. It seems there’s really nothing outside the moment, and if I had to choose between past me, current me, and future me… well, I choose present me every time, because we’re three different people. My brain is just effed up a little and convinces me I care too much about this future me person. I find I cannot overcome this irrational no-doubt-biologically-induced mental block and therefore I continue to live responsibly.
How about some discussion of teleportation? It ties in closely to this same idea. I don’t care how well it seems to have worked out for (the new) you, there’s no freaking way I’m doing it. Or forget teleportation, what would it mean to replicate a person down to every last subatomic detail? But if I only exist in the moment do I care one bit about a replicant? Am I nothing more than a replicant of the me that existed here a short moment ago, with the whole continuity illusion still intact? Death is either the most tragic product of the universe, or uttlerly meaningless. Unfortunately my amygdala still reminds me in my half-asleep night terrors that I care about this for some reason.
Speaking of the universe, there should really be nothing. That will never be explained. Same for time, it is not independent, and it has another name already, called “change”. Time does not go on; things just change at regular rates relative to other things in their nearby universe.
That was fun. Forgot my unhappiness for a few moments and almost eased myself to sleep.
There was a time when I thought it was more important to be smart than it was to be happy. I was wrong. I have chosen to dumb myself down a bit so that I can enjoy life more. I just quit thinking about things so “deeply”. I was figuring out that I was just making it all up, and it really didn’t mean or do anything other than make me unhappy.
Now I realize that I am wrong probably 80% if the time, and I don’t argue with people as much. That is nice.
Everyone wants to be the top dog, I have chosen to let them. I just don’t care to be in charge, or thought of as smart. I would rather be thought of as fun.
I think having the ability to think about things deeply is a fantastic skill- but one that needs to be settled sometimes. Being present to what is around you and what is happening right now is a very powerful way to start getting to what it is you want in the world.
@ Blowden – I don’t exaggerate my areas of mental precision, but I can see where you might yours, or at least where you might want to, for instance your use of colorful language. As to not taking things so seriously, I kind of agree, kind of don’t. In one sense, I’d say “going with the flow” is convenient, especially as a way to reduce stress, but it’s a bad way to maximize your potential.
@ Chris L – Thanks Chris, I make a strong effort to reply to almost every comment, even if, like with yours, it’s taken me a few days to get back to it.
Your illumination about how the route to happiness for many people comes at the cost of other good things, like the environment, proves rather clearly the degree to which you do see the bigger picture. And I completely agree.
As to your points on atheism, you’ve touched on the concept of the soul, and though I don’t talk about all of my views regarding the soul on this blog, my extreme sense of atheism does, in fact, require the lack of belief in a soul. However, telling people “I have no soul” doesn’t seem to fire too many people up
We should talk sometime.
@ Veronica – You, Veronica, just touched on how I define happiness. Your achievement in your career has been the main thing absent in my life, and, as I hope you’ll see in just the next few days, I’ve got it cracked.
@ Paul-
I would first wonder if they are in the clutches of nihilism, because finding everything to be futile is pretty close. For that, I would, were I to believe that I could help them become happy and if I knew they were receptive to new ideas, turn them toward a philosophic enterprise of creating a subjective sense of value based on the truth that life is futile. That task might be beyond me, but if you’re interested, I’ll discuss it at greater length with you. Ultimately, that’s my life ambition.
As to the Buddhists and Hindus, they have found a value in the futility and they identify it through their religion. If they practice their religion successfully, then they will find happiness in it. In other words, for them, there isn’t actually a futility, because the religious objective of enlightenment isn’t futile.
Finding a passion has a prerequisite: knowing oneself fully (yet another philosophic notion). If someone knew oneself fully, then they could focus their ambition on something they felt was achievable on one hand, but also bigger than them on the other. Of course, they couldn’t achieve that if they felt like everything was futile.
Meaning is subjective. In order to believe it, we have to create it.
@ mrsmartypants – I agree that taking someone’s religion away from them could be very irresponsible.
@ Megan – My reluctance to dumb myself has often been a source of my unhappiness. I don’t want to. So, my goal is to manage my affairs so that I can bring them both together.
@ Veronica – That concept, of forgiving some of the depth of thought to find ground in the present or pragmatic surroundings has always seemed like a shame to me. I aim to retain my sense of wonder and aspirations to think deeply about things forever.
I will be rather short.
I think the best challenge for very smart people is to become very wise (and there is no any test for this case), once you succeed, you will understand the meaning of the life and can be happy among “common” people.
Abraham Joshua Heschel:
When I was young, I used to admire intelligent people; as I grow older, I admire kind people.
@ Sal – I couldn’t possibly agree more with you…
Another great blog.
@123sal. Nicely Quoted “When I was young, I used to admire intelligent people; as I grow older, I admire kind people.”
Smart people adapt and overcome. As a species, it has nothing to do with ’settling’ and everything to do with ‘evolving’. If you feel so superior, then your quest for knowledge and true wisdom must be over. Wow, how did you reach enlightenment at such a young age? Um, you haven’t found enlightenment. You just fell into elitism. Every single person on this planet has a lesson to teach. I have learned more from idiots than I ever have from self proclaimed scholars. Also, true intelligence is measured by one’s ability to apply what has been learned. If an individual cannot apply knowledge, well, that individual is very much like someone that continually drinks to the point of uncontrollable projectile vomiting. Save your elitist bullshit for the ‘Romans’. If you really feel that you are so different than the ‘Romans’, prove it. Get out of the cubicle. Surely, you are smart enough to find a way to survive without that particular job. Otherwise, go back to the vomitorium and heave with the other ‘commoners’.
Yes, this is how I feel most of the time as well.
My husband, my son, and i all have IQ’s above 150. We have lots of fun together, but we are all somewhat awkward in other social situations. It is frustrating to be unable to communicate our ideas,jokes, etc to other people. We almost always feel left out, even though we try very hard to fit in. Having a high IQ is not always a good thing. Those of you who are responding to these posts in a defensive way are assuming that these high IQ people think of themselves as superior. It is more likely that they think of themselves as inferior in more ways than you know. They could use some help in relating to others so they can become happier by being more integrated into normal society.
First message is for average joe’s comment about many months ago. If you are average then you don’t know what a smart person does.
Second message is for all of you. Did you ever think maybe everyone else is the smart ones? They are happy and content. They look at us and shake their heads. Maybe we lack something they have which causes us to become bored of what we do repetitiously. And, maybe, thats why we believe they are not smart. The very society that says we are smart is the same society we find so many problems with. As for the sex and drugs I feel are very stimulating (I don’t do drugs but I do love me some sex). As long as you are honest with yourself and happy then you are content.
So face it all, you guys are Roman because you still abide by society same as I do. Everyone knows that misspelling a word is still readable yet we still believe we have to spell it right because of the very ancient rules we mock (or atleast I mock i.e. religion). The point of communicating is to protray the idea in your head to the person you’re communicating with to the best of your ability. You’re all hippocrats.
I understand the purpose of this article,but what sparks my interest is if you aren’t Roman, then why the hell are you even in Rome? It makes no sense(at the very least,to me it doesn’t) why you’d be in Rome if you aren’t Roman. Go to Venice! Or Tokyo,even! Just stay the hell away from Rome.
Don’t think so much about youself. Work on letting those you care for shine, whether they’re smart or not.
You make good points, however, many of those things can be fixed.
For example the BORING LIFE part, if you cannot find any challenging things to do, make your own challenging goals. There are many cheap, fun to make projects that are intellectually stimulating.
A smart man wallows in sadness, and wise man learns to soar.
I’ve never seen someone so infatuated with himself.
Why “smart” people are whatever? Doesn’t mean anything!!
what’s “smart” to begin with?
Come back to earth.
EVERYONE thinks they are smart and deserve better, EVERYONE is bored and lonely.
These romans you speak about that just “work, play, sleep, eat, poop” and find it funny, they DONT EXIST. No one is just happy doing that.
You think like I used to think when I was about 14 and thought I was better and smarter than the rest of us. Your text looks a lot like the stuff I used to write at the time. Maybe you are 14? In any case, you are definitely not smart.
Anyway, quit blogging, shut up and get smarter before touching a keyboard again.
One of the few websites where I don’t have to accept there/their/they’re as interchangeable.
Loose/lose, through/threw, you’re/your and a whole myriad of spelling and grammatical errors.
A real breath of fresh air.
clst: You misused myriad ;-P
High, I found this article very interesting. At least I feel I am not the only miserable guy out there. I gave a lot of thoughts to all that before even I read this article and I came to a sad conclusion: Being smart can be really hurtful. Also I don’t consider myself smart but just different. Yeah, different is the word I use because I believe I am not that smart after all. Because If I was, I wouldn’t be stuck here doing what I do and dealing with people who don’t understand me. I would just say that I am smart enough to know I don’t belong but not smart enough to get somewhere else more comfortable. So If you believe you are so smart, what don’t you do something about it? (I bet you didn’t see that one coming) . No offense!!!
It’s simple: Get the fuck over yourself. Find the problem. Take the steps to solve that problem. You can blame others all you like. That isn’t going to make you have better life. Yeah… bitch all you want. Ever stop and smell the roses? So you all just gave up? Is that right? Have you tried to dig deeper? Or are you happy with your mundane life? Just going to continue to bitch like little teenagers. OK, I understand. Everyone is always going to have their own point of view. They are always going to think what they want. No point in arguing, or trying to find subjects you don’t connect on. With everyone you meet, there is a different connection. People are not one dimensional. It’s your fucking problem if you aren’t digging deeper, dreaming, planning and making life worth living. Actions speak louder then words. If you are continuing to live a life that you hate… and aren’t fixing it. Well, then… put up… shut up… and deal.
[...] Here’s the link: Why smart people are unhappy | I Will Not Die. [...]
Silly people, comparing IQs [as an absolute determination of intelligence] and presenting the works of other apes like they’re gods. Sadly, the lot of you have no idea just how myopic you really are. Like a fog light, the light’s just being focused one direction at a time: the view is still foggy outside of this narrow illumination.
There’s no use trying to explain, because if you don’t get it, you just don’t. I’ll just say that there’s too much emphasis on personal exaltation [and extreme scholar-worship] because of this so-called “intelligence” that so many of you profess to have.
Has anyone considered maybe unhappy people tend to be smart, and not the other way around?
People who don’t enjoy doing everyday tasks spend more time staring into space and thinking, giving them more thoughts and making them feel smarter.
I am extremely lazy and I daydream a lot. I believe this is a trait shared by many unhappy people. From my daydreams I have gathered many thoughts about things, and spent a lot of time putting them together, so I am more familiar with the rules of logic. I can point out mistakes that are made in my thoughts, or the thoughts of other people, which makes me look smart.
I am not a sad person. I’m just not particularly happy.
I find that the article here brings home many of the points I have tried to convey to friends, strangers, parents, siblings with but a mere inkling of success. The jist of it all is that so few people “get it” that you can’t help but think that you’re either genetically wired differently compared to the populous or you belong to some other planet! As a simple example I would like to show you what I have found is a fact but few people around me are aware of:
Fact: It is not necessary to work in life as a human being. It is possible to play(rather than work) and still accomplish the acquisition of necessities in life along with variant extras that are not so necessary but add to the comfort and enjoyment of life.
It has taken some time to acquire this fact because society has a built in worker mentality but I’ll admit it was not diffiult to pick up and there was no resistance(how absurd would that be) in understanding that work was not at all necessary. Now if you walk down the street and ask a stranger if work is necessary you can bet your left leg that he/she will say yes. You might find some people that will say no but it is very rare(I’ve never found one). Of course I’ve had people respond that a large inheritance or some other contrivance might eliminate the need for work but that is not the point I’m trying to convey, the point is whether it is necessary for any human being to work at all. And the point is always missed because they have fallen for a belief that is not even theirs. This is just one substantially detrimental belief that many people happily or begrudgingly accept but others wholeheartedly do not because it is not factual much less beneficial to boot. Work is a special title for activities that everyone must be preoccupied with according to society, it has nothing to do with enjoying the experience of being alive(if you need a justification for this forget everything ive typed) until the product of that work(whatever it is) has been brought forth. Any necessity can be gotten and maintained quite enjoyably, it is the beliefs and current structure of society that make this acquisition difficult and laborious for thoughtful beginners who are just beginning to distinguish what should be “common sense” from all the absurd beliefs mascaraded around town as “truths” or “necessary”. And for those who say they truly love their work I can only say that if you genuinely enjoy what you do 90% of the time, that it makes you happy then you are not working, you are playing, fun=play
comments on the comments — way too much focus on IQ. That oversimplifies the whole problem. The problem is capacity – measured by MANY things, including intelligence, energy, creativity, fearlessness, willingness, experience, inner personal strength, determination. The “in Rome with the Romans” thing isn’t just a… Read More problem of smart people trapped in a stupid world, but capable people trapped in a lame world – lameness in all of its many, many manifestations, including chickenshitism, self-pity, social retardation, laziness, foolishness, and maybe very smart smart-aleck people addicted to inertial navel-gazing. Like Aias, grab the mast, bust it off, and sweep the decks clear. Now its your ship. Cast off and pilot the thing. Get off the IQ crap. You can still be a “smart” piece of shit.
a little bot to add to my comment above – #144. the Aias thing is a metaphor only.
Dereck had some great insights. I like his conclusion (get the hell out of Rome), but I would one-up him on it – better yet is to beat the Romans at their own game; play harder than they do; get guerdon; take their money and enjoy their infrastructure. Even if it takes half a lifetime (and it might) there is no better choice. You can actually enjoy the heck out of it if you adjust yourself correctly for the “game,” and you can get the “Romans” to treat and reward you like a hero. Free school; challenging work; respect. What could be better than that? Certainly not surrender or retreat. So, I offer “I Will Not Die” website dude “Dereck” a graceful and happy alternative: Make them “work” for you – one way or another. There are plenty of them who will pay you to do stuff they could never do. Milk it. Share it with your family. Bring home a different kind of “bacon!” Learn how to pretend that you are a Roman so well that no one can tell the difference until you are free. I am 55 and retired at 45. I went to law school (JD) )and graduate law school (LLM – a specialization research degree) on full-ride scholarships. I have one daughter in college and one in graduate school, and I invested enough to pay for most of both before they were 16 years old. House is practically paid for; I own 15 acres of really valuable investment land. I have a lifetime pension adjusted annually for inflation using a reliable BLS formula, and lifetime medical care with minimal co-pay – I am set. I fix everything myself – cars, house, electrical, plumbing, computers – everything. I wrote all this to encourage young people with broad shoulders and big brains to not despair but put all you’ve got into it and make it come to you. You can do it.
bit not bot – I’m in a hurry . . . .
Don’t they :”when in Rome, do as romans”? But that does not mean we have to become romans right. I can perfectly relate to all of you guys but I don’t call myself smart but just different. What the point of being smart anyway? What matters the most is to be happy. That’s why it’s said:”Ignorant are blessed”. Ignorants don’t need that much to be happy! Smart people have high aspirations about themselves and it’s what make them unhappy. You cannot relate to others and so what? You don’t need to relate to interact. And believe me or not, among all the romans you meet everyday, they are a lot of smart people that are going thru the same things you are but who don’t want to get noticed. So they keep a low profile. The only way to uncover them is to interact with everybody. Just to give an example, they was that girl at work that I kind of liked because I felt she was different somehow but I never dared discuss with her because I thought she could be just like the other girls with whom I usually have a hard time maintaining a conversation (what to talk about?). But lately, just by accident, we have been talking together and she is really smart….
Anyway, I would recommend many of you to read this book:”The art of Happiness” by HOWARD C. CUTLER. It says that happiness is an art not a gift. In other words we make/create happiness, we choose to be happy or not. So It’s your choice.
Like I said earlier, I don’t call myself smart in spite of my high IQ (who gives a crap about IQ anyway, I hope you don’t) because if I can’t solve the basic problem of unhappiness, I might as well call myself dumb. Yeah you guys have to review the topic. This blog shouldn’t be how about smart and unhappy you are, it should be about how to become happy by usng your extra skills.
What about us average joes who want out of Rome as well? Well, under-average, seeing as I’m flunking half of my classes three weeks into the school year, but that’s besides the point. I’m not the most mentally-capable people you’ll ever meet, but fortune hath bestowed upon me an introverted and philosophical nature that grudgingly enjoys these whimsically deep conversation. Am I supposed to hitch a ride out of Rome with you geniuses or stay behind with all the supposed beer-chugging Idol lovers? I’d love to take the risk, but quite frankly, I’m not blessed with any of the stand-out qualities that would make that possible. Is there anything a lucky chap like me can do? Someone identify me, please. I’m so lost. v__________v
Kill the Romans. That’s the answer. Since they are such a hedonistic, pleasure-seeking people, that’s the only thing they’ll understand. Hey, if Rome wasn’t burnt to the ground centuries ago, we’d all be speaking Italian. If smart people are going to genetically advance past our club-bearing, moronic counterparts, we’re going to have to use our giant-brains to take them out. The problem I’ve always had with being a “secret genius” (I say secret here cause god knows if my alpha-male friends ever found out, I’d be stoned to death) is that MOST intellectuals and “smart people” are die-hard humanists and pacificts. All the while, the stupid, beautiful people world step on us (and their own grandmothers for that matter) to ensure that they can club the woman of their choice on the head and their seed will prosper. Well, we’re never going to prosper if we just idly sit by and watch each other die out. Smart people of the world unite! Destroy all Romans! Let’s fight fire with fire, and watch with joy as Rome burns to the ground.
@ Mike: Intellectual terrorism
@ Ennio: Haha, at least someone got that I was half-joking. In all seriousness though. I think all the self-proclaimed non-Romans of this post are neglecting something real important: the idea of making temporary alliances with the Romans in order to get what we want out of life. When I was in college, I still got beat up a lot for asking out the women who were “taken” by these Roman gods (i.e. these guys unwittingly must have sprayed their pheromones on them, hence marking their territory). I used to go into work with black eyes and stuff when finally the biggest guy at work asked me what was going on. After I told him, he said, “Mikey, I think you just need to make some big friends”. The rest of that year I hung out with him and one of his 6 and 1/2 foot phrat brothers and it was one of the best years of my life. I helped them with their math and accounting homework, and they actually kept the other cavemen at bay if one of the cave women took in interest in me. As time went on, I started to actually develop a bond with these guys who were totally different than me in everyway and actually learned something new: we are all in this thing together. Someone mentioned being kind to people in this, well, I’ll go a step further. Be kind to those who can respect your qualities as a “non-roman”. All-the-while, still know that many “Romans” are going to want to have you hung, and just try to stay away from them (and their women for that matter). MAKE BIG FRIENDS. I hope everyone on here can find happiness in SOME people, regardless of their backgrounds.
sorry about the mispelling on “frat”. That word isn’t important enough to me to get it right.
@ Mike: Does being a litrtle bit smarter than the average makes us “non-Roman”? I am starting to loose the point of this discussion. How about emotional intelligence? If we are so smart with problem solving skills, how come we can solve this problem called “unhappiness with the romans”?
@Julian Honestly, I do not know what constitutes someone being smart. That’s a little thing that’s been neglected here called wisdom. I.E. being able to say “I just don’t know the answer to everything”. Do I think emotional intelligence makes someone smart? Absolutely. I think there are a lot of different types of intelligence one of which is called common sense. Oddly enough, emotional intelligence, common sense, artistic abilities, etc. are usually not measured in our precious little IQ tests and fruity mensa groups.
I actively seek out artists and emotionally intelligent people to hang out with (aside from my 7 foot body guard buddies of course). Why? This is because its something that I’m completely lacking. I think its apparent to everyone from the way I write that I am an emotionally callous person. I think it all boils down to common sense. The logical, cold-hearted thinker guy needs the big, socially-active bully guy needs the sensitive, artsy guy. “Can’t we all just get along”?
@Mike: I wouldn’t more agree with u on all those different kind of intelligence, thus my questions. I was just trying to outline that the so-called smart people or “believing to be smart people” usually forget an important point: Intelligence cannot be measured solely thru an IQ test. Regardless my high IQ, I always feel really dumb that I cannot control the fact that my life is going south. My unhappiness is just due to the fact that I cannot relate to anybody close around me (I relate with u guys but u guys are not to up close, are you?). I always feel like the system is playing against me since nobody really want to appreciate my ingenuity when confronted to complex problems. My own supervisor always tries to divert me to less important tasks for some reason. My belief is that he is scared that I might outperform him in front of our common boss. We don’t get along because I try to ask to do more important tasks but I am always relegated to small one when less skilled people are given the big ones. And I feel always a kind of uneasiness pouring down all his pores when I am around him, which results to him trying to send me off another disdainful task. All I need is to have people appreciate me for who I really am. I don’t want anybody to call me genius or worship me, far from that. Do people hate creativity that much?
Talking about my relationship with women, I don’t seem to find one I can hold a decent conversation with. I always find their interest so lame and boring. Who really cares about what happened to Angelina Jolie yesterday or that Beckham was found cheating? I am interested in sport off course but just for relaxation but I am not a fanatic. Thus I am scare of getting in a relationship that I will regret later on and I hate hurting people because I am also a real sentimental (it sounds opposite to intelligence but it actually makes me really creative).
I feel lost most of the time but sometimes I believe it’s so ironic. I tell myself:” Hey Jul, you say you are smart and you haven’t figure out yet how to get along with this people?”. Why can’t I just blend in? That’s so frustrating!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
PS: Forgive the spelling mistakes but I am too lazy to check the spelling.
@ Julian
Well, you tackled some tough ones here young man. On your work situation, I’ve been in the business world for over 9 years. The past two years have been in quality control. I’ve learned a very important concept. Its what I call the “sarge-in-charge” theory. Most bosses don’t feel threatened by you (why should they? They can fire you whenever they want), they don’t think you are dumber, they just have to FEEL in charge. Yes, believe it or not, some people NEED to be in charge to be happy. This guy just wants you to shut-up, do your job, and make him look good (I know its harsh but its true). He is always going to think he’s smarter, more ambitious, better looking than you, etc. merely based on the virtue that he is THE ONE IN CHARGE. You got two options 1.) Do whatever he says and suck it up until he gets fired (and he will get fired) and take his spot or 2.) (the route I took) put a shit ton of salt and hot sauce in his coffee the day you are going to quit so you can be in charge of your own life, and master of your own destiny.
Also, be VERY careful letting him know your solutions to work problems. I’ve learned this personally. He will say “that’s terrible”, send you away, and then steal that idea and make it his own.
As far as relationships are concerned, I don’t know what to tell you brother. I was married for 4 years and we had problems getting along. One thing I did notice is that I dont know who or what a “beckhem” is, but im sure my ex did. And when she would get excited about that stuff, I would make fun of her. Just like she would make fun of me for the movies, music, venues, etc. that i liked. We actually enjoyed teasing each other. Point to it all brother is DONT EVER COMPROMISE yourself in order to make someone else happy. Itll make them happy not you. Youll have to get feedback from the smart women on this thing on what they like to talk about. I’m sure there are things you can find in your girlfriend hunt that dont involve that beckham guy, or what Angelina Jolene is wearing (hey, I’m only concerned about what it is if its on my floor next to my bed anyway).
Okay I read the comment on here that said “Because I’m lazy but that’s just about all” Smart people aren’t necessarily lazy, they just lack the correct stimulation, when I look at all the efficiencies I cut down on at work and realize that I turned an 8 hour shift into 4 hours with work and 4 hours with the customers and my work is at least twice as accurate as my competing employee, and for my remaining four hours I don’t do much work, an employee who was observing from the sidelines would say I’m being lazy those last four hours. Teachers in public schools have failed any smart person who is lazy, they measure everyone to the same standard, even those of us who excelled in honors classes, we did all the work however very rarely is your inquisitiveness satisfied, just because you understand a subject doesn’t mean you understand the various motivations and demensions to it.
some smart people are lazy in school because they may already known what the teacher may be teaching so they are bored
I’m 5′ 4″ tall, 365 lbs., fetal alcohol synrome eyes, long greasy hair with chipped yellow teeth, and enough acne for a cotton picker to go into a crazed dance. Additionally, I’m a Graduate of Grade 8 and work in the book department at the local Walmart. Instead of Princeton or Oxford, I chose to enlighten myself through looking at the photos in “National Enquirer” and some skin books. My maw told me that one of the ’skins’ is called “Hustler”.
My maw told also me that I’m smarter than all of you.
All the chicks are crazy about me, too.
SO? I guess that I’m the winner on this site.
Yes George you are
your mom told you that your smarter than everone else when you havent even met them
The fool don’t think he is wise, but the wise man knows himself to be a fool
Oh my God–this is like an epiphany for me.
you put into words….how anyone who searched around and found this…feels. I also walk through my day to day life saying…why? after years of dreaming about being a musician, artist, lawyer and wish i was in that extra super smart people category of astrophysicist…ect….i also find myself torn between both the roman world and..the “smart” world….i was blessed both with a brain and an extreme athletic ability “high school/ college track and field records ect….i find myself mistaken often times by intellectuals as a “roman”…i enjoy “mundane” competition and lifting weights ect…as well as complex thinking…..mostly because of my thought process……I see man as an animal and do much thinking on why man in general is in conflict with his world. the point being….were made to kill, win and do it again, the brain is a tool to do so….i believe you must stimulate all your desires..but this belief traps me between worlds…when i’m done “watching football drinking beer and banging a super hot broad” and i wanna sit down discuss chess, physics, evolution toss a little history and politics in there for good measure, and dream about about the profound nature of existence…..Perhaps we are all boned…the point i believe you were trying to make was find a balance to find success….i’ve found a decent balance and i do enjoy a decent amount of success over certain others, it still seems the dumb man wins though…….and i must watch him run “MY” ship into the ground…….seriously heres a thought…..someday…..as mundane jobs start to no longer matter with automation replacing labor and service….”smart” people will come to control everything…i guess i take comfort in being “born to early”….and hope my genes carry on, and not “thad with 19 children and a degree in digging ditches”
Hello, thank you for the article, and also for the discussion.
This subject is one that I have been contemplating a lot for the past few months. You see, that’s mostly all I do.
I am 19 years old, so I recently finished highschool. I have arranged my lifestyle very specifically to cater as much as I can to do what I do. I live a very contemplative lifestyle, doing research, studying various courses over the internet, writing, and just letting my mind go wild, in any direction that interests me.
I live a very frugal lifestyle such that I can support myself on little money earned by doing odd jobs here and there for various people, and local farms, I don’t have a real job though. I don’t drive, I’m a cyclist, I ride a recumbent trike everywhere, even in winter, in a rural area of Canada.
People know me either as the local eccentric, or as “a lazy teenager who is a leech to society” depending on their open mindedness and general intellect.
So, there’s a bit about me.
Now I have been faced with some of the feelings described in this article and in the comments. I think it’s getting worse and worse for me over time. Already and for a while I have found it increasingly difficult to partake in the boring discussions most people have. Their often poorly thought-out opinions more frustrating, their lack of depth disappointing.
I almost feel as though I have a decision to make, like I’m at a crossroads of sorts. Should I just let my creativity and mental figure run wild and ride it to whatever depths it may pursue? Or should I keep a hand clutched to society, to people, to the “Romans’ life”? Can I have both without sacrifice? Is this a false dichotomy, or a very real dilemma many brilliant people are faced with?
I am unhappy in some ways, and in others, I am giddy with euphoria to be alive. It depends on the moment. All I can say is, I think people who operate in their own way, people who feel isolated in a world of people who just don’t understand…need to pursue their passions and interests. Find what you must do. I know this is very easy to say and for many it will be very difficult to really do, but I leave that up to them.
Also, take good care of yourself. Don’t cause depression due to poor treatment of your precious brain. Your brain is you, after all. Exercise every day (even going for a walk is good), eat healthy wholesome foods, and be outside every day, even if just for a few minutes.
Find your Ikigai, or roughly translated, the reason you get up every morning and what you intend to do with life. Don’t have one? Make one for yourself and follow through with it.
Sorry this turned out to be a long post, one of my hobbies is writing after all.
Sincerely,
Young Non-Roman